Do It - Even If It Scares You. Ruminations On Creativity and Fear

This post has been brewing for a while now, and I've found around two thousand reasons not to write it. I have just realised why, which I'll get to in a minute, but first, I want to tell you about my friend, and a conversation we recently had.  My friend is a talented artist. Anyone who lays eyes on her work recognises her talent immediately. Yet she doubts it, and herself.

In the course of our recent conversation, I was busy trying to encourage her, and tell her she truly was worthy of recognition as an artist, and she bravely shared that she has started work on a new piece for a competition. Then she faltered, awkwardly finding it hard to articulate what she was feeling, with an "Oh, I don't know. It's hard to explain."

She didn't actually need to explain. I know.

"You're worried that this time, it won't work. That this time, everyone will find out you've been fooling them all along. That you really are no good and all that work you've already done was some kind of fluke and you probably can't do it again."

The look on her face was, I think, a combination of relief and horror. "Yes! that's it exactly! But, how did you know?"

I knew, because it's the exact same story I tell myself every time I begin to wade into the waters of creative endeavour. Every. Single. Time. I also - as a result of extensive investigation - have come to understand that's it a common story many (if not most) creatives tell themselves - so thankfully, I felt a little braver sharing that than I once may have.

The act of creating something is quite a mystery, and often when I'm done, it seems a tiny miracle this thing has come through my hands to the world. From which point it is very easy to fear that when I begin my next creative attempt, the tiny miracle may not show up; and I'll be shown up for the fraud that I surely must be.

Fear and I have been having some deep and meaningful conversations lately. Deciding it's time to write the book I've been wanting to write for - oh, I don't know, my whole adult life - got Fear's juices good and gushing.  Thanks to the writings of Elizabeth Gilbert (whose new book Big Magic - Creative Living Beyond Fear is about to arrive in my mailbox -  I can't wait to inhale it), I was inspired one day to try having a chat with Fear.

What I've learned is this: Fear wants to keep us safe, which isn't always a terrible thing. But it can't distinguish between an oncoming train and the light at the end of the tunnel, so it jumps up and down and tells us to stop right there, and get off the tracks because we are in danger of meeting our mortal demise.  Predictably, the closer the oncoming train - or end of the tunnel - gets, the louder and more demanding of our attention Fear becomes. And that's the key - it wants our attention. So, these days I have a chat with it.

"Thank you for working so hard to keep me safe. I appreciate how well you've done that so far - I'm still here, thanks to you. You're right; I might make a fool of myself if I send this manuscript to a publisher, I might even get some negative feedback on what I write; but you know what? I'm OK with that, because I want to live a life of adventure and courage and boldness and authenticity, and I will survive if someone out there doesn't like what I write. I promise that I'll create the best thing I possibly can, and I'll give it everything I have. I promise to acknowledge you when you tell me you see danger. I need you to come along with me, but you can't drive the damned bus!"

It's astonishing the extent to which Fear quiets down after that. Much like a small child - all it wants is your undivided attention for a moment, and then it's happy to go off and pull the wings off flies for a while, during which time - if you're smart - you can get a chunk of your creation progressing nicely. Someone once wrote a book called "Feel The Fear - And Do It Anyway." I never read it, but the title winds its way around in my mind frequently. Because that's what creating is all about. I know I'm going to have to meet Fear head on every time, but I also know I'm going to do it anyway. Sometimes, like this post, it might take me a while to recognise Fear is what's stopping me; but here is this post, different from the posts I usually write here, written now. If you're reading it, that means I felt the fear and hit publish anyway.

She Could Be Anywhere - Art Journal Page
©2015 Tracey Hewitt

 For some inexplicable reason - known only to the Gods of confusion - things have been chaotic here for the past couple of weeks.  New babies, growing babies, special visitors, annual reviews, feeding the multitudes, tax provisions, weaning calves, birthdays, unexpected departures, physiotherapy, coaching sessions, and home butchering - are just a few of the things that have landed on my plate lately. 

So it felt really wonderful to claim an hour in the studio and let it all pour out onto the page.

This little lovely has a background of acrylic paint and torn book pages on watercolour paper, while she herself has been brought to life with Prismacolour Pencils. 

Sometimes, when I feel like I'm done with the drawing, some words will want to be added to the page. 

"She could be anywhere... and she chooses here... with her heart in her throat"

are the words that fell out of the white paint pen and onto the page. (Have I ever told you how much I adore that Sharpie white paint marker pen? It's a cracker!) And, while this face was never intended to be me; those words feel like they belong to me this week. Of all the places I might ever have ended up; I am here. I choose here. Even when things are hectic and demanding. Even when I struggle to find time for the things I need to do; much less the things I long to do. Here is where I choose to be. 

Even when my heart is in my throat. I still choose here. 

Try Something New

What does it say about your personality when you have an idea to try something you know bugger all about, and think "I can't do this, but I'm doing it anyway?" I don't know, either, but here are the results! For a long time, I have thought that adding a few videos of works unfolding and techniques in action might be fun for me, and interesting for you. I have a lot to learn, and will possibly need to relocate to an area where I can access a much bigger Internet data quota (apologies to the Aussie Government, but this NBN thing isn't working out so well for us out here), which isn't such a realistic idea. I think there is a lot of research and education in my immediate future if I'm to follow this notion any further. 

However... this was fun for me, and I hope you find the video a little bit interesting. It's a time lapse look at creating a background with tissue paper on canvas for a mixed media work. The background was done without any firm idea of what the focal point might be. That realisation came a little later.

Small Wonders 

©2015 Tracey Hewitt  Watercolour and mixed media on canvas

After the addition of some acrylic paints to introduce a little colour, it occurred to me that this would be the perfect background for another challenge I'd been hankering to take on. A photo of our Granddaughter, Payton, in a rare moment of stillness, had been whispering it's longing to be drawn or painted for a couple of months. For someone who, a few years ago, wouldn't even attempt to draw a face or human form, because "that's not my thing, I just can't do them"; I'm pretty excited to have captured a resemblance to a human being, much less enough of a resemblance to a particular human for her parents to know she was the model!

 Her features were sketched in, with Derwent Graphitint pencils. These babies might be my favourite art supply. (Even as I type that, a hundred other little special art supplies are clamouring in my mind to be named favourites, as well!) These pencils - as the name suggests - are much like a graphite pencil, with the added appeal of a range of beautiful, subtle colours, as well as being water soluble. They're not as intense as some of the other water soluble pencils out there, so the results are soft and delicious. A little watercolour for the pink in her dress and lips, a few touches of inky black for details, and she was done.

That little butterfly she's so intently looking at? That is a perfect example of the glorious serendipity of layering materials and media. It wasn't until after I'd drawn Payton in, that I noticed that little butterfly on an underlying layer of tissue paper, perfectly placed to seem to be sitting on her hand, and the focus of her rapt attention. Sometimes, there are forces at work when we create that simply cannot be explained. Happens to me all the time. And, it's the best feeling. 

A Tale of Three Art Journal Pages

Just One Heart Art Journal Page
© 2014 Tracey Hewitt

One way and another, the art has been struggling for attention lately. What with plotting ways to spoil a new grandbaby, end of financial year, and a tiny change in our farm business structure (how is it that a tiny change necessitates a thousand phone calls, pieces of paper, and forms to fill in? It will forever remain a mystery...) just to name a few; the time available for creativity has been limited.

 

There are, thankfully, Art Journals. Smeared with paint, spattered with ink, heavy with bits and bobs glued in, and carrying no pressure to come up with anything special - just to pick up a brush, pencil or scrap of paper and slap something on a page. Aaahh.... balm for a careworn soul.

 

As I'm writing this, looking at Just One Heart up there, I realise there should be a comma after the word blooming. Oops! (As a self confessed grammar Nazi, that's going to bug me quite a bit!) The page was created with Dylusions Ink sprays, assorted stencils, a few bits of paper, coloured pencils, stamps and marker pens. The Art of Whimsical Lettering by Joanne Sharp delivered the inspiration to have a crack at some fancy lettering - which was tremendous fun!

 

Worry Art Journal Page
© 2014 Tracey Hewitt

So much fun, in fact, that there was more on the next journal page. Worry is a Misuse of your Imagination. I need this tattooed inside my eyelids! Not only a misuse, but probably a terrible waste of imagination as well. Constructed in a quite similar fashion to the first page, with acrylic paints instead of ink sprays, and a hand cut stencil. Manilla folders are infinitely more interesting used to cut a stencil than they could ever hope to be in my office.

 

Ink Calf Art Journal Page
© 2014 Tracey Hewitt

As life's path seemed to be walking me more and more towards cows and tractors (which I shouldn't complain about - that enterprise kind of keep us fed and clothed), and further away from the studio, I engaged that imagination, and decided to try bringing the farm to the journal. This little guy is brushed in Sumi ink (my current infatuation) over a stencilled, ink sprayed, and scrap paper collaged background. He's funky, but I think I love him.

 

 

A little story, for your information: I often add links to products, books, artists, places - pretty much anything that I think is great. Only because I use it, love it, just plain cannot live without it; and to make it easier for you to find more info about the things I'm waffling on about. No one pays me to give them a plug - it's all about the love!

Art Journaling - It Feels A Bit Like Therapy

 

Does this pile of luscious goodness look like fun to you?

 

 

How about all this snowy, fresh paper and clean brushes?

 

Wheel that trolley out onto my back verandah and into a gorgeous autumn afternoon, and the stage is set for some serious Art Journaling fun.

 

 

A while back, I sent out feelers to see if maybe one or two people might be keen to spend a bit of time here exploring a few art techniques and materials in the safety of their very own Art Journal. While I love where I live, it is a small community, and I thought I might be lucky if I could find any takers. To my surprise and delight - there were nine! All keen to excavate the creativity they hoped was buried in them someplace. 

 

Over the course of three hours, they were introduced to Dyelusions Sprays, Distress Stains, stamps, stencils and all kinds of markers and pens, which they used to create some really fun backgrounds and play with lettering styles. Of course, many of them (OK - most of them) looked a little horrified when I suggested it was time they write - in their own handwriting - in their journals. When I asked how many of them hated their own writing - hands went up all around the table. What I told them in essence, was this:

 

 Every mark we make, every word we write, comes from us. Is us. Our essence cant help but show up in everything we do. Hating our handwriting (substitute voice, thighs, drawing, tummy, crows feet, toes, teeth.... you get the idea) is to hate a unique and authentic part of ourselves.

 

I know we all do it (I am guilty of it often!) But, I'm coming to believe that we have more to give when we give ourselves a break. When we are OK with ourselves and our efforts.

 

 

I reckon they all found the tip of their creative icebergs. Which makes me really excited for next week, when we'll have a play with acrylic paints, try drawing faces and dedicate a page to our Inner Critics. I've named mine "Muriel" (apologies to any wonderful and beautiful Muriel's out there...) and she can be a real shrew. Should be fun to share our stories and see the portraits these great girls create of their own versions of Muriel.

 

A Tale of Two Paintings

Farmers Fortune
43cm x 53 cm Acrylic on watercolour paper ©2013 Tracey Hewitt

Let me tell you a story about these paintings. Our local ambulance officer is a beautiful lady who grew up in Tonga. (her name is Sela, and she has the most dazzling smile I think I have ever seen). She was visiting our local exhibition last year, and admired Farmers Fortune very much, but wished it had a thatch hut and a palm tree instead of a house and a windmill. For me, this painting speaks of hot dry days, and the relative harshness of this life on the land, as well as the breathtaking beauty of sunsets and open spaces. A farmers fortune seems to be paradoxical - harsh, tough and frustrating, while at the same time full of beauty, awe and connection to the earth. Sela, saw something else. She saw the skies, seas and sunsets of her birthplace. A kind of magic danced in eyes as she stood and looked at it. Seeing her respond and relate to it so strongly is the kind of connection we artists hope for - a deeply satisfying experience.

A delightful conversation later, she commissioned me to create her vision on a large canvas (the piece I painted for her is roughly twice the size of the original).

Now, I tried earnestly to convince Mission Control that I needed to visit Tonga so as to bring a level of great authenticity to this piece. Thank goodness for Google Image searches! While restful hours on a Tongan beach remain beyond my reach for the time being, it has, in the course of creating this piece, made it's way onto my Bucket List - the more you learn about a place, it's appeal grows infinitely greater.



Tongan Treasures
105cm x 75cm Acrylic on canvas  ©2014 Tracey Hewitt 

 Sela took delivery of Tongan Treasures, with it's thatched palm hut and pair of palm trees - to represent her and her husband - last week; a gift to herself for one of those birthdays with a zero on the end.

To say it was a pleasure to create for her is an understatement - creating a piece with a specific person in mind is possibly one of my favourite things to do, and Sela's enthusiasm for it when it was delivered was infectious and delightful.

In the meantime, Farmers Fortune is still quietly and patiently waiting for the person to whom its story whispers to come along and give it a home. I'd love to know what story it tells you?

                                                                        


Making Time for Art

 

This sign just went on the studio door. I've never had a sign like this.

 

Let's back up a little, and explain some things. I recently signed up for ArtBiz Bootcamp. This programme for artists is offered by Alyson B Stanfield, of ArtBiz Coach fame. In the past, I've learned lots from her book and a couple of other classes I've taken with her. This 'assignment' was week one, fundamental stuff. It's taken me almost four weeks to actually do it!  You wouldn't believe some of the stuff I told myself about how and why this wouldn't - couldn't - work for me. I won't make you want to poke yourself in the eye with a pencil by telling you all about those excuses in detail - just know, they were lame... really lame. What was exciting though, was how great it felt to finally choose to commit to some not negotiable time frames to call studio time. I think I may have even heard an hallelujah chorus off in the heavens somewhere - though I can't be sure about that. (It may have just been Garfield objecting to a lack of appropriate cat food in his bowl).

 

What I wanted to share with you though, is that this action - choosing some times, printing them on a bit of card, and hanging it up - created a big shift in the way I think and feel about my work as an artist. Like I'm taking myself seriously.

 

Sometimes small actions can have big consequences....

 

What little thing have you done that has led to big things? I'd love to hear. Tell us all about it in the comments.

 

Why Online Classes Rock My World

 

My Mum recently took me to task about the lack of interesting activity here on the blog. OK, the lack of any activity at all. She had a point. (You've got to love Mums for keeping it real and calling you on your shortcomings.) There hasn't however, been a lack of activity in my world - as my middle prince would say- lots of cool stuff (OK, so he wouldn't say stuff, he'd say another word that starts with s...but I'm sure you get the idea) has been going on.

 

In amongst a bunch of other 'stuff', I've been working away in an online class with the irrepressible Jane Davenport. It's not the first of her classes I have enjoyed: Supplies Me is a wonderful journey through a vast assortment of media while she teaches the nuances of drawing faces and figures -things I long ago swore off as being 'not my thing' and something I believed for a long time I just couldn't do. The lovely lady above was the result of my explorations in "Ink Week", where Jane's students discover the joy of Sumi ink in an Aquawash pen. I have to tell you; that's the most delicious, free feeling media to work with and I can't believe it's taken me so long to discover it! It was quite difficult to stop drawing, which goes some of the way to explaining how she comes to have a couple of mouths and a nose on her chest and shoulder.

 

 

Most recently though, the "Print and Scan" class has held me spellbound. For a very long time, I've been keenly aware of a limited understanding of digital file sizes, types and manipulation. I lost track of the countless times I told myself I needed to learn this 'techie' stuff. Then, *cue violins and blinding bright light* I read that Jane has created this class - the very one I need, with all the skills I need to learn! It's Jane's first Professional Development class; and the investment paid for itself in the first class. The image above is a scan of a 2 page journal spread. We learned how to manipulate the image to get rid of the 'gutter' in the middle of the pages, and lots of other techniques to show the artwork at it's glowing best.

 

 

 

After a small mind explosion (don't worry, it didn't make much mess) - and a bit of practice - the lovely lady made her way onto the journal page; and changed the colour of her face - all in the innards of my computer, with information streamed to my computer desk via the wonder of technology and the Internet.

 

What's great about Jane is that she delivers this in artist speak, not techie talk; though she has extensive technical knowledge. What's great about the Internet delivery is not having to drive for hours (and hours...and hours..); You can stop and start that video and toggle back and forth between your image manipulation and the instruction, so you practice it as soon as you see/hear it; you can work on it at whatever time suits you; and - possibly my personal favourite - you can hang out in your paint stained shirt and yoga pants. (Have I ever told you just HOW much I love my yoga pants?)

 

In honour of Carmel (my awesome Mum) there will be effort made to post stories of more of the cool 'stuff' going on around here. Right now though, it's time to go and log into the Print and Scan classroom for some more mind exploding fun.

Feeling My Way In Cunnamulla

..

"Feeling My Way" exhibition  at the Cunnamulla Fella Centre Art Gallery

I can't quite believe it's been 6 weeks since this:

I'm pretty sure I promised a report on the exhibition... somewhere I seem to have lost some weeks (I do in fact know where they've gone, and over the next little while, I might even get as far as telling you about some of the things I've been up to!) But, for today, a little step back in time to Cunnamulla.

My beloved came along (it was an eight hour drive, so the company was great for a start!) I have to say, at around three o'clock on the afternoon we were hanging it all, I was overcome with thankfulness to have him. His skill, care and attention to detail with tape measure, screwdriver and ladder made me fall in love with him just a little bit more (if that were, in fact, even possible!) It's a good lesson for those of us who are the 'creatives' - it's of tremendous value to have as your sidekick, someone who has a natural inclination to practicality and order. A 'thinker' as opposed to a 'feeler'; if you're a follower of Meyers Briggs Personality Profiling. Whilst I am perfectly capable of locating my practical brain, while I'm deep in creative brain mode, it's more of a stretch. I learned some very interesting things about myself out there!

But, enough about me already! The gallery space at the Cunnamulla Fella Centre is, as you can see, just beautiful. It's a fabulous facility; part of the centres museum - which is brilliant and well worth a look as well.

The staff - Carmel, Sally, Courtney and Mike were everything you'd ever hope for - friendly, helpful, kind and fun!

It was great to meet a few locals while we were there, and I was super excited that sales on opening night were beyond my wildest imaginings!

We had three nights in Cunnamulla, and the recount wouldn't be complete without a shout out to Pieta and Pitisi at the Club Boutique Hotel . Have you ever had a vase of fresh roses on the bedside table in your hotel room? That's just one of the things these girls do in order to make their guests feel welcome. It truly felt like coming home to our family at the end of a day. We discovered Pitisi has a great appreciation for tractors - and my art work - which enamoured her to both of us!

Thanks so much to everyone at Cunnamulla - we had a wonderful stay, and I couldn't be more thrilled with how my fist solo exhibition turned out. 

If you're out that way, you still have a couple of weeks to see it - it closes on the 24th May. While you're there, would you say hi to everyone for me?

Thanks.

Cunnamulla... I'll See You Soon!

In a month, I'll be off to Cunnamulla! A town in South West Queensland, which I have never visited, to hang an exhibition in the Cunnamulla Fella Centre Art Gallery. I'm a bit excited, a bit nervous and kind of busy.

Some of the pieces that will be getting loaded into the car:

Keeper of the Mystery 101cm x 76cm
Acrylic, tissue, oil stick, lace and pencil on canvas
© 2013 Tracey Hewitt

If you've been visiting here for a while, you'll know that the human face is not something I generally look to for subject matter. Keeper of the Mystery certainly didn't start out with any intention of a person appearing, yet, as it evolved, she insisted on making an appearance! (My family of practical males are bewildered when I suggest that an 'inanimate' object like a painting  might be telling me secrets, or what is to happen next...but, that's how it works sometimes). And, I have to tell you - she knows the answer to all those questions that we mere mortals struggle with. But, no matter how hard I look into her eyes and plead with her to share them with me - she doesn't. You see, she's not called the Keeper of the Mystery for nothing!

I've been having a great time with resin, as well. This lovely ring (I keep wondering if I can, in fact, bring myself to part with it? I LOVE this) has a bunch of tiny millefiori glass pieces set in it. How cool would this look with your jeans and favourite white shirt?

My awesome framer, Les Rigby, is currently weaving his magic with this piece, as well as a number of others. This is a concoction of woven felt strips that had all sorts of goodies applied which was then dry felted with a machine felting technique. Have to give a shout out to my sister here - that triangular piece in the top centre was in fact one of her earrings in 1986. ( If you hang onto something long enough....)

This one is in need of a name - any suggestions? Coming up with suitably engaging names for a number of works is just one of the things that will be keeping me busy over the next month. (Containing my excitement about the wedding of our middle son is another - but that's a story for another day!)

Do you know anyone in Cunnamulla? I'd love you to share with them that the exhibition "Feeling My Way" will open there at the Cunnamulla Fella Centre Art Gallery on Friday 5th April from 6pm; and I'd love to meet them!

Creating Texture - With Old Tomato Paste Tubes!

Sometimes, I do weird things. 

It's kind of fun, and keeps the people around me shaking their heads...

Today, it's been reclaimed tomato paste tubes. (Yes, I cut it open and washed it carefully first - after we ate the spaghetti bolognese, which was awesome, by the way...)

The inside of the paste tube is the loveliest, soft, buttery gold colour, and it's easy to bend, fold and generally manipulate. Here, it's got some painted vliesofix and a chiffon scarf ironed over it, which gives it that orange-y colour in patches. Keeping it company is a piece of copper shim, with many holes poked through it with my trusty - and very blunt - awl. Don't worry, I keep an old awl just for nasty, tough jobs like this. There does exist another pointier, sharper, better looking awl for the tasks awls were really designed to carry out. 

The copper shim becomes a kind of 'claw' to set the glass bubble in, and after a bit of free machine embroidery (plus three broken machine needles and countless broken top threads), the end result looks like this:

This little lumpy treasure is destined, along with some other lumpy treasures, to be the focal point on a canvas that's been evolving in the studio.

If you promise to eat all your vegetables, I might even show it to you when it's finished. (Yes, Carmel* - that means you!)

*Carmel is my Mum - who is awesome - and also happens to be the worst vegetable eater in the history of the universe!

Monoprint Musings

Monoprints!

 I adore them. There's a lovely energy about them, and the marks and quality of line have something special going on.

But, I'm having a battle inside my own head (please tell me you do that, too....).

With a solo exhibition coming up, the self imposed pressure to have a wonderful body of fully realised, great pieces is becoming large. And, somewhere along the way, clarity and certainty have abandoned ship. I adore these prints, and have a strong urge to frame them as is. No more messing with them. Yet, is that "acceptable"? (Acceptable to whom? is a good follow up question.... Myself? Potential collectors? Potential critics?) The answer, I'm finding, is elusive.

Or, is just a little more attention an improvement, a detraction, or still not enough?

One thing that is certain... even more attention - at least of this kind - is definitely NOT the answer (I apologise. I would really like to sneak the above image from under my arm and just show you the quickest peek - it doesn't make my heart sing. At. All.)

So... nothing more than these delicious lines and marks?

Or, just a little more?

I'd really love to know what you think - my cowboy art critics are all busy with cows and cultivators, and the "inner critic" ate razor blades for breakfast! 

Perhaps the underlying issue is that while I love these as is, or with just a touch of colour, they were easy. Drop-dead, do-it-with-your-eyes-closed easy. Well, maybe not with your eyes closed. That might end in much more black gesso on the carpet, which is never a good thing (or, for that matter, an easy thing to clean up!) The question is possibly more along the lines of "If it's easy, is it art? Is it valid?" Which led me to remember a chapter I read in Danielle la Porte's book The Fire Starter Sessions... which started with the question "What would your life be like if you did only what was easy?" and went on to discuss Quality Easy as opposed to Cheap easy. 

"The path of least resistance isn't about short-cuts  cutting corners, or being clever. And  it's certainly not about making mediocrity acceptable. It's about optimising the truth.It's about casting your seeds on the most fertile soil for your best chances of success."

Definitely more rumination required.

Tea Bags, Doiley's and Linen Napkins

Lillian's Legacy 101cm x 76cm 

Acrylic, tissue, damask, tea bags, silk, oil pastel and paper collage.

© 2012  Tracey Hewitt

For the longest time, I have had these panels tucked away safely - waiting for the wonderful day when I might finally know exactly what to do with them. (It's embarrassing to even mention how long...)

I am very lucky to have had a Nana who kept special things - like boxes and boxes of hand embroidered doiley's and damask napkins, which she enjoyed giving to me to 'do something with'. One of the napkins made their way into a natural dye bath. 

And waited. 

One of the doiley's was used to take rubbing's on used tea bags. 

They waited.

Until one day, some silk strips from the natural dyeing episode came to join them, and they were fused and seed stitched together.

As a pair of 'panels' they waited....for many years.

Lillian's Legacy - detail

Every so often, they'd get pulled out, caressed, admired, promised something special would be done with them, and carefully put away.

To wait some more.

Finally, their wait is over. I've been wrestling a bit with work for the next exhibition. I'm not sure where my muse had been on holidays...but when she came back, this was what she brought with her. Quite a bit more subtle and restrained than my usual works - yet it feels good. There's much more to explore here - I'll keep you posted!

"Worthy...Of Love and Belonging"

Worthy... of Love and Belonging
hand felted panels on paper
© 2011 Tracey Hewitt

A while back, I was commissioned to create a piece of work for our local doctor and his wife, as a gift from his staff, in honour of their 30 years of service to our little community. It was a special opportunity to pour a little of my own heart into a piece that, as well as honouring his dedication to this community, felt like a personal thank you note. Doctor Bruce - as he is fondly called (technically he is Dr A.B.Chater) - has delivered babies, counselled troubled souls, mended broken bones, stitched open wounds, fished metal fragments out of eyes, removed injured or diseased toe and fingernails, dealt with 
anaphylactic shock, torn ligaments, bad backs and more - and that's just for my immediate family! He's a very busy man.

Yet, when the tricky things happen - and, for some reason, they have happened often around here over the years - he's there with a smile and a reassuring voice, and immense skill, to put the pieces back together again (A bit like all the King's horses and all the King's men really!)

So, "Worthy... of Love and Belonging" came into being. A series of hand felted panels, embellished with turquoise chips, beads, hand stitching and even some recycled, re purposed beer bottle caps attached; mounted onto watercolour paper.

Here's an excerpt from the artists statement that went with the piece:

The felt panels – to me – represent diversity. The diversity of characters in the patients you care for; of the illnesses and accidents you minister to; and of the medical services you offer at Theodore Medical. All three categories broad, extensive and varied. The panel concept started in my mind as felt banners, or pennants – like the sports pennants of our schooldays - representing achievements. There are no doubt nowhere near enough here to honour all your achievements, but hopefully the whole is greater than the sum of its parts!

The turquoise band represents the Dawson River. An integral part of your lives, and the life of our whole community, and - like the Dawson - it binds the elements together. I chose turquoise gemstone chips as a reference to the belief of many ancient cultures that turquoise holds great powers for healing.

You’ll notice the repetition of some elements four times on some of the panels – recognizing your four sons who call Theodore home.

Worthy...of Love and Belonging was mounted on white matt board and framed in a simple white frame. (which isn't in these photos, because I am far from having mastered the art of  photographing art work under glass. I'm sure there must be a way....have you got any tips for me?) 

Thanks to the staff at Theodore Medical for giving me the opportunity - and having the faith in me - to create this piece. I loved every minute of it!

More of What Lies Beneath...

Do you remember a post a while back about "What Lies Beneath"? I decided to take Sarah's advice, and tackle a series, based on that piece.... Here is What Lies Beneath #2...

What Lies Beneath #2 ... Fear  25.5cm x 30.5cm   mixed Media on Canvas
(c) 2012 Tracey Hewitt

This one began with the word Fear ... not a theme typical of my work, yet exactly what this series needed to tackle head on. The original word is totally obliterated - which feels like a good thing, yet the piece has a  dark and broody feel about it. I'm quite uncertain what the face in the top left corner is about - but he was there, and refused to leave! Does he freak you out a bit, or is it just me? (and by the way, don't ask me why he's a 'he' with such red lips...but there's no doubting it in my mind!)

Even the birds, which to me are a symbol of freedom and lightness, have a heavy, menacing sense to them....

I'm not too sure how I feel about this piece - 

What Lies Beneath #2 ...Fear - Detail 
(c) 2012 Tracey Hewitt

Except that it feels important to have created it. I'd love to hear what you think of it - love it or hate it?

Zentangles as Therapy

A while back, we talked about Zentangle here on the blog. I shared with you how much I enjoyed this, as it legitimised my incessant need to doodle!

Recently, I was invited to share some Zentangling fun with the residents and clients of our local HACC (Home and Community Care) - mostly more 'mature' members of our community - which was great fun. So  engaging, in fact, that the camera sat idle in my basket until there was just one lady left. So, I grabbed it and shot a few quick photos. I was even fortunate enough for one of the staff to think to suggest she take a photo, so that I might be in one for a change! Jenny and I are having some kind of deep and meaningful discussion about her efforts by the look of this...

My friend Kathy had asked me along; this lovely piece of work belongs to her.

For the uninitiated, Zentangling is really all about making complex looking marks from simple, repetitive lines - and while you're at it, achieving a very centred, almost meditative state - it quiets the mind, slows down your pulse and breath rate, and is generally a feel good kind of thing to do. It was wonderful to watch the participants get lost in their paper and pens, and suspend, even for a short while, their concerns with their health and for some, a focus outside of constant pain.

I loved having the opportunity to join our HACC team for this activity...They are a great bunch of women who care so very much about the welfare and well-being of the people in their care. (Just a few of them are pictured here: L to R. Jenny, A HACC client, experiencing some challenging health issues at the moment; Kathy - my special friend  responsible for me joining them - thanks Kathy! Jenny, who has been the face of HACC in this community for the longest time, and Diana, the activities officer - who also happens to be one of the most precious friends a woman could wish for!)

I have long held the belief that art has the power to transform our experience...this activity showed me that even something as simple as doodling within a framework, can have a powerfully positive effect. Will you give yourself twenty minutes today to create something (even something as small and simple as a doodle) for no other reason than your own well being? I hope so. Today, I'm hoping, you'll take care of you. 

Road Trip to Brisbane - Matisse, GOMA, Southbank & Chocolate!

I am a very lucky woman. My Daughter-In-Law gave me a ticket to the stage performance of  Mary Poppins, along with a planned 5 nights away in Brisbane, with her Mum and Aunty, and a few of her friends (who are all great fun, by the way).

Mary Poppins was fabulous! Sadly, no photography is allowed during the performance, so no pretty pics for you - just take my word for it that the sets are incredible, singing and dancing faultless, and all in all, it is an awesome show.

I also was excited to be in Brisbane at the same time as the Matisse - Drawing Life exhibition. I whiled away a few very happy hours in front of the drawings and sketches of this skillful artist.

So long in fact, that I had to make my way back to GOMA (Gallery of Modern Art) a couple of days later  to check out the rest of the exhibits...Including this remarkable piece - a pair of taxidermed deer, covered in glass bubbles... I'm still trying to decide how I feel about it, but there's no doubt it is a compelling and intriguing piece. 

I'm disappointed I didn't take my good camera out with me on the river cruise (all you can eat seafood buffet...yum....), but it was raining so much (and we'd been completely drenched the evening before - on our way to Mary Poppins - drying off under the hand dryers in the ladies room was something we'll laugh about for many years to come!) that I wasn't prepared to risk drowning it. So, iPhone pics are all I have to share with you. But this shot of the Storey Bridge all lit up is a happy reminder of a great time.

I'd never visited Southbank before, and was most impressed with the space and vibe. This shot was taken from where we enjoyed a leisurely Sunday lunch.

After lunch we found the Chocolate Shop - Chocolate by the Bald Man Max Brenner. Leah and Cassie may have taste tested something that didn't quite tickle their taste buds the way they expected...Lets just say their advice would be, before taste testing, make sure the label doesn't read Bubble Bath! 

We laughed, talked into the nights, ate, shopped and possibly had a glass of wine occasionally. With the theatre and two trips to the Art Gallery in 5 days, I can't remember when I've had such an injection of culture all at once!

Thanks Leah; and your family and friends - that was a blast!